Music boxes

Music boxes
Music boxes have within melodies they carry in them, once they're open music feels the air;
Every person you have known has a song of their own, once they open up you'll hear whats there;
Every person longs to find who they are deep inside, every person yearns to know their place..."

Monday, March 27, 2006

did you know....

Unstopable dreamer

...that the Eiffel Tower is light brown and not gray as I thought? :p

I'm in Europe right night, came with my girl to my niece's wedding. We had a loooong layover in Paris, 8 hours, so we got on a bus and got to see the Tower. It was cold and rainy, but still got our noses out to take a pic. It's fabulous!

Anyway, just in case you were wondering what color it was, now ya know, lol...

We are having a fabulous time here.

I'll tell you all about it when I come back! :)

Monday, March 20, 2006

"Miracle workers"

Unstopable dreamer

For a long time now I've had mix feelings about "feel good" reality TV. Like extreme makeovers, or giving away cars and houses and all kind of nice things to people in need. Don't get me wrong; I'm happy for those who receive these blessings. It's just that I think about other people that also need things, maybe more than the ones on TV, but no one notices, and let's face it, they can't help everyone. Take for instance: the other day I was watching "Regis and Kelly" and they had this wonderful thing they were doing for a family in New Orleans. I was so happy for them, I was seriously crying. But then I think; how many people from New Orleans are watching this now? How many of them needed this even more? And how, please tell me, how do they feel watching this? Are they happy for the others? 'Cause it isn't fair if we balance things like this.

But you know, since I was never in that situation, I was never "the other one" watching and not receiving. I have a house; I have food to eat; I don't need a nose job. So I always wondered... until last week.

"Miracle Workers" is a new show on Monday nights where doctors and specialists do extreme life changing surgeries and treatments for people that have already lost hope. They made a lady walk the other night, and a blind man see. It's an amazing show.
Last week's episode brought reality TV to my reality. I saw a teennage girl with severe Tourette Syndrome. She could not control her tics, she kept slapping her head and face and doing all kinds of strange things. If I was watching that behavior for the first time in my life, I would have thought she was really weird. But I didn't, because my eight year old daughter has the same illness.
I looked at the girl and saw my daughter in a few years. Right now her tics are somewhat under control, medecine and therapy are helping a lot. Our neurologist has warned us though, it will get worse during her teenage years. How worse? No one can predict. Only time will tell.

And so I watched this girl... watched her shaving her head for the surgery, trying on some wigs... then I watched the actual surgery, where she had to be awake in order to tell where exactly the electrode was going to be placed. They found the spot. Just to be sure, they increased the voltage and her tics started to get worse and worse until I yelled at them to stop it already, you're torturing that girl! But they had to do it to make sure it was the right spot. It was. And just like that, as the voltage started adjusting, I saw her face go back to normal... no eye blinking, no nose and mouth twiching, no jerks of any kind. I saw a miracle happen before my eyes. And I was crying... I thought about my daughter and how uncertain her future behavior is... but I wasn't crying because of that; I was crying of happiness. Because I knew. I knew exactly how that mother felt during this whole ordeal. I was finally in a place where I could look and think, how, this is me! I know exactly what they are going through!
And it was that happiness that made me cry; because I knew that the suffering was gone, not for me, but for one that felt like me... and that felt good.

I don't wonder anymore. I'm grateful for the people that get relief and the help they need.
Who cares if they're just doing a show to get viewers to watch and earn millions themselves... They are performing a miracle to someone.
And that, to me, is enough.

Sunday, March 12, 2006

Way to go, honey!

Unstopable dreamer

I have an 8 year old little girl that's in second grade and is a smart cookie, as we like to call her. Her weekly quizes average 97/98, she's that good. I actually think she'd do 100's all the way if she wasn't so easily distracted, but I'm not complaining about that, lol, she's awesome and we're very proud of her.
Last Friday she did exceptionaly well, though. She came home with a 100 on the math test, 100 on the reading test (The only one in her class of 21 students to get 100, she made sure we understood that!...) and a practize reading quiz where she got 9 out of 10 correct. This last one would normally be an a ok, but since this book she took a test on was a level 4.8, that meant A LOT for a second grader! Oh, and the spelling test, like usual, 105, counting the extra credit words.
Aaaaanyway... she was so excited, and I, of course, made a big deal out of it because, well, because I'm a mom, that's why.

When my husband got home, she ran to him to show him the work of a little genious... daddy was very happy as well... maybe a little too happy, 'cause he couldn't get over it and wanted to know what she did different that day to get such awesome grades. (you see, if you ask me, I'll tell you that since she's already a good student, "luck" was what brought this all up). But no, he wanted to know, and made her think of something she might have done differently.
I think in the back of his mind he was hoping she'd say "I paid more attention", or something of the sort. You know, dads are always looking for ways to teach the children a lesson or two on the hardships of life, and how we can better ourselves when we do our part.
After thinking for a bit, she finally remembered something.
"Oh, you're right, daddy! There WAS something different! I didn't study yesterday!"


Thanks dear.

Friday, March 10, 2006

How do you lose a friend?

I have four people in my life that I know for certain would do anything for me. Unfortunatly, they don't leave near me; I still count them as my true angels though, because I know they love me unconditionally, and I can always count on them.
But there's a part of me that aches for a friend like that who lives close to me; one that could come as soon as I called her crying, one that I wouldn't be afraid to just drop by and stay a while and just be there. It's the physical contact, I guess, the hugs, the shoulder, the tears she would let me cry.
Ever since I moved here, over 8 years ago, the search has been on for "THE" friend. Funny thing is, I was certain I had find her, well, let's see... at least 5 times. We become good friends, share secrets, I get all excited, and then, poof! She's gone. Our conversations aren't as personal, she doesn't return my calls, she's tired and busy with other things, and I'm left to wonder what I did wrong. I'm hurt for a while, then someone else comes along, and the story repeats itself all over again.
What is it? How do we lose friends like that? I can only thing of 2 reasons; one, there's something wrong with me, or two, she was never my true friend to begin with (this one hurts a lot more).

Anyway... As I was thinking about these things today, the lyrics of a favorite song popped into my mind. I couldn't describe to you how I feel today if it wasn't for this song; it really says it all.

"I can't do everything.
I know, because I tried;
I told myself I could,
and then found out I lied...
I believed with all my heart
that I could do it all...
But I can't do everything,
and when I try, I fall.

I can't please everyone.
I know, because I tried.
I needed their love so much,
Sometimes I compromised...
But the more I live and learn,
the more I plainly see
that I can't please anyone,
until I'm pleased with me."